Friday, September 21, 2007

Dead Dogs

It's a term we use when the dogs are sooo lazy they look devoid of life. Now we have 2 breeds (3 dogs total) in our house. Mind you boxers (the 2 big ones in the house) are known for their exuberance, joie de vivre, bounce of the friggin walls kinda joie de vivre. I swear to god these toads are the biggest, sloppiest couch potatoes I've ever seen in my whole life. Not that I want bouncy freaks, no I got over that one with the lab I had previously. It's not so much a complaint as it is an observation, these dogs are LAZY SLUGS. We try and take them on a walk every morning. It's about 8 blocks before Roxy is done. She'll just start going slower and slower until she finally hits a shady spot that looks good to her and she stops. At 55 lbs it's funny to see B pick her up and drag her home. If it's really hot out (yeah, Texas) we'll cut the walk short, about 5 blocks. And even the big burley dog Jayne will come in the house and collapse onto the hardwood floors as though we'd just walked a million miles. The rest of the day is then spent in recovery mode. Different spots of the house are chosen to flop upon with eyes rolled into the back of the head with little paws twitching as the imaginary bunny is chased across the fields. Yeah, like their lazy asses would last that long. I can hear the bunnies laughing as I type.
Our most recent doggie addition was the frenchie I have been searching for the last year or so (see blog banner for the little man's face). French Bulldogs were bred as companion dogs. At least he can use the excuse that he's supposed to be a useless couch potato. Those stumpy excuses for legs and the smoosh face that can't get air to his lungs no matter how hard he tries, well yeah, he should be lazy but he's 11 months old! Just a babe! He should be bouncing off the walls just on principle. Nope. That one walk kicks his butt. When we first got him a month or so ago he was totally out of shape, couldn't even make it the whole 8 blocks. I had to carry him for the last 2 and he couldn't keep up with the big guys during the part that he could walk. He's in much better shape now and is very excited (still panting his little noggin off) to be able to keep up with their hind legs (he still can't quite keep up with the front legs yet).
I'm not sure what would happen if we just let them go to pot. Would they get bored and chew up the house? Would they turn into flabby blobs that perked up only at meal times? Ah to be a dog in todays world....

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