Saturday, August 30, 2008

Just a little side note

The lovely hubbie did find one photo. Just one, and it wasn't all that risque, just as I thought. More Rockabilly than Goth, and I can't fine my old year book for that really old gothy photo but I'll still keep looking for it. Maybe he knows where it is. There are just too many books in this house! Pop on over to his blog to look at the picture, lord knows it's been neglected for so long he'll have coronary if there are more than five hits in any one month...the link is the first one listed in the blog links.

Friday, August 29, 2008

I have lost my mind

Wait, I may never have had it. Regardless, I don't have it right now. So yesterday I though I had forgotten to take my pills for a bit. I now think I may be mistaken so I am just going to keep following the pill box and go status quo and assume that the pill box knows nothing of what the day is. Anyway I fed the dogs as normal this morning. Put the big dogs out side with their food, the little twerp inside with his. When they finished I let the big dogs inside and booted the Corbie outside to go potty. Then I got myself going in the kitchen to take pills, water, clean up after the kid and looked at the clock. Crap it was almost 7:30 and the kid was almost going to be late for school. Yelled up the stairs, let her know she needed to get on the ball, she wasn't going to make it if she dawdled and then she wouldn't get her E for the day and no toy box goodie for the day from the teacher (it's a motivation to get her moving faster) and then locked the big dogs up in their crates. I don't, however, recall ever letting the little dog back in the house and locking his butt in his crate. So after dropping the kid off at school at 7:35 and getting to work at 8:00 (lets hear it for speed, efficiency, and not getting caught, or in any accidents) amazing what you can do in 30 minutes, I am walking to the building thinking. Thinking....I can't recall ever putting the little dog in his crate and I think they are calling for rain today...good thing he's not the Wicked Witch of the West. My mother goes over to the house to let the dogs out to potty on the days the dh works though so I called her to give her fair warning so that she doesn't panic when she walks in to see an empty crate. She tends to panic first and think last. That's just her m.o., her brain, she doesn't usually bother using it, why when she can just freak out first? I am so glad my dad raised me, and here you guys think I am strange normally. I could be so much worse. Anyway, my brain, I am in no way getting any closer to finding the poor lost thing. I hope it found some nice comfortable place to hibernate because it's going to be awhile. Sadly I seem to be doing ok without it so far.

*Update* Mom called, yup, left the poor little runt outside and boy was he happy to see her. Good thing it hadn't started to rain yet. Like his world was going to end if he was left outside all day. Spoiled rotten brat.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Oops...I forgot

To take my meds. For like 4 days. I looked at my pill box this morning and it was full. Last empty square was Sunday. Yeah, Sunday. That was a first. I accidentally weaned myself off of the Keppra a week early and the Topamax cold turkey. I'm not even going to bother calling the neurologist. Like I'd get a freaking response from them any way and they'd probably want to put me back on something. I don't have any head aches and the migraines are probably due to the Eustacian tubes. I'll go to the ENT appointment on the 10th, have that looked at and then we'll re-visit the Topamax if and only if the neurologist personally insists and has a large hissy fit. LARGE hissy fit with scientific papers followed by scientific hard evidence to back her up. I'm not taking it just to make her feel better. I won't go back on any meds unless there's damn good reason though. It's going to have to be damn good reason too. My new standard in life, I don't want any meds and if any procedures need to be done on me I will only do them fully sedated. Yeah I was wondering why I had been able to feel my hands and feet lately...should have been a dead giveaway huh?

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Going to Club..and things we used to do

Back in the day, ok back when we were around old friends in San Diego the dh and I would occasionally got to club. Specifically Sabbat. It was only once a month because it was a goth club. Why goth? Well I suppose that was kind of a drag over from high school days. Hell all of our friends are from high school. I was goth before the style was even called goth. In San Diego we were called "Darkies", I know in the south that phrase probably means something totally different. The dh was not goth but his very good friend was, plus they both had a thing for those morbid chicks. Well lets face it, most men love that short school girl skirts, tight corsets, thigh high stockings, garter belts, yeah, well, it's all about visuals for boys right? So now you get to know a little bit more about the darker side of me, too bad there are very very few pictures in existence. If you're really nice and pop over to the hubbies blog you may be able to beg him to dig out one. Because there may be one I just don't own them. Not that I know of at least. I think I have a picture in an old year book of mine but it's only a head shot realy. Freshman year of high school, no really, it was one of those stranger year book photos. Maybe I can dig up that one and scan it in. We'll see. Other wise ya'll will have to resort to harassing the dh because he mentioned not 3 days ago finding that old (terrible) Sabbat photo very recently.

Anyway every few days I flip through the San Diego newspaper online to keep up with the news out there (plus their newspaper is just so much better than our local one that just sucks big wiener dogs) and their entertainment section was spotlighting Sabbat. I noticed that it is now the 2nd and 5th Saturdays of every month which is more often than it used to be. It used to be only 1 Saturday a month. Hey, it's a goth club, we were lucky to be able to have one at all. It is kind of a traveling goth club at that, kicked out of the last place it was residing due to clashing personalities. The woman who runs it leases the space from the regular club. In San Diego the club it is at is The Flame which is a gay/lesbian club. When I last went is was more of a lesbian club. Before that it was at another gay club that was more predominantly male. I think I liked that one more. The lesbians seem more like they have something to prove, less relaxed than the guys. Now mind you there's still some animosity there towards the goth crowd and the gay crowd. On Sabbat night. On Sabbat night you'll see the regulars come up sometimes and they'll be like "Aw is it goth night? Damn it!" and turn and go away to another club. It's just not where they want to hang.

Hence the transient goth club, there's not enough of the goths to warrant a stand alone club but there's enough of them to get a good crowd one or 2 nights a month. And there's a good crowd. Go to a larger city like say LA or NY or even Austin probably and you'll get a stand alone club. San Diego, not yet. San Antonio, I wouldn't even bother. Plus the only real reason we went was to hang out with friends and make fun of the people. Man were there some funny looking people that went to these things. Oh and lots of people wearing spandex that shouldn't be. Oh yeah and fashion faux pas? Yeah that happened a lot. And several things that I'm sure were not legal to wear in public so they had to come in under long coats only to be shed at the coat check. It was one of the few places I was able to convince the dh to wear a mesh shirt to. He still hates that thing but I liked it on him so he would wear it for me. Don't expect to find any pictures of me in anything risque, there are none. There may be some in my closet but I did not wear them to club. My dad would watch the kid on the nights we went out and he was terrible about getting her to bed. Half the time we'd get home and he'd be totally asleep on the couch and she'd be bouncing off the walls. Yup, that's my dad. Love him to death but disciplinarian he was not. So we could wear strange but not risque. There is a fine line and we did not cross it. I still remember the first day the dh wore his kilt, the dd was like 3 years old and she comes up to him and lifts up his kilt to check what was under it. You do know what the difference is between a skirt and a kilt right? Well if you're Irish the difference is you wear underwear under a skirt. Alright then, now you know.

No sleep for the wicked

Or at least those who don't know anything about a/c units. I think ours froze up. Yup, August in South Central Texas and our a/c is not working. We have 3 brachycephalic dogs so I have to use the limping along a/c in the meantime which is probably not good for the damn unit, oh well. I tried to defrost it last night so we tried turning it off and wet vac-ing off the water that condensed off into the drain pan every hour or so for 5 hours. At about 9 pm we turned it back on and it still was not working well but such is life. The dang condensing unit is in the attic (as is the hot water heater), why do builders put these water things in 2nd story attics? I mean really when they over flow bad things happen. As it was the pan had over flowed and the wood underneath it had some water on it. I have since put some old towels on the wood for future issues but the drain for this pan leads out to the wall all the way up on the back side of my house on the second story so I can't back wash the line to clear it out. Also you are supposed to run a cup of bleach through the line once a month. So you know, I can have a cup of bleach run all the way down my dark red brick wall every month. Now that is just plain stupid. Who is going to fix that stain? Morons. Oh and the insulation in my attic? Blown in insulation all over the place. Sure, that's not going to get in that pan and in the drain line and clog it up. That stuff is all over that pan. It makes no sense to me at all, none what so ever. Who came up with this system? They stuffed everything in the attic, the heating, the a/c condenser, the hot water heater. What a pain. All I know is that I want my a/c working again. So tonight we are going to shut that thing down for a good 10-12 hours and see how much we can get defrosted off. Then we're getting a maintenance guy to come in and see about cleaning it up some and see if that doesn't help any too. The house is only 2 years old, it can only be so worn down. Sure the blown in insulation can give it a run for it's money but dang, they used it on all the houses in the neighborhood and as far as I can tell everyone else still has a/c. We can't possibly be the only people with this problem. Friggin Texas and the heat, I swear.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I let my mil take my 4Runner this morning

So she could drive herself to Lago Vista, north of Austin. A bad idea you say? Yeah I totally agree. Did I tell ya'll about Saturday? No? Yeah I don't think that draft made it up. Well it went like this. Many years ago the mil and her husband (a beautiful man that I adore) got a time share a little north of Austin at Lake Travis that they never use. They have never been there and they now want to sell it. So her husband wants her to look at it while she's here.

Sounds easy right? Well ya'll know how Texas is ass backwards right? In CA (much as I hate that great state) things were pretty straight forward as far as roads and freeways are concerned. Not so much in Texas, they are pretty damn ass backwards here. It is unbelievable. You know my 50/50 chances in Austin from that post a few weekends ago right? Yeah well last weekend we spent a bit north of Austin in Lake Travis trying to find this Lago Vista. Never found it. 8 hours and 200 miles later never found it. The kid actually tolerated it pretty well but she had a birthday party to come home to so that was the up side. We left at 10 am and got back at 6pm totally unfruitful. The dh was in a GREAT mood by then end. We did get a few maps, printed out a thing on Map Quest but really, the combination of no real solid directions, park rangers with their heads up their butts and an odd lake shaped like a sperm (?) yeah so it was not all that great.

So when the mil called her husband to let him know that we did not find the place he was not happy and could not understand why we couldn't find it. I love the man but I would really like him to come out here and find it himself. Well really I'd just like him to come out here, I miss him and I know he'd enjoy seeing our little girl again. So the mother in law is now on her way up to 20 minutes north of Austin. She has bad vision, bad maniacal driving habits, has no clue when it comes to orientation, doesn't know the city or state she's in, oh and the weather, it's thunder storming today, yeah, thunder storms. If she makes it there it'll be a miracle.

I have no idea if she'll make it back. If she doesn't we're screwed because I have no way of making it home and I'll have to find some one to pick the kid up from after school care by 6:30 when it closes. The good news is that I have a bazillion of my neighbors signed up as ok to pick up my kid from after school care (no, my mother is not one of them, big surprise there right?). But we'll see how it pans out. Austin is 90 miles north of us here, Lake Travis is about 10-20 miles north of Austin, she may be able to make it the and back in time. Alive. Who knows. Oh ye/me of little faith. Yeah well you guys have never seen the woman drive. She's kind of the original ditzy blond except she's not blond. Oh and did I mention she doesn't see well? Yeah well there ya go. I have good car insurance though so there's that. I hope she does ok. I know she's only really going because her husband doesn't think that there's any reason that we shouldn't have been able to find the place on Saturday. He just doesn't understand that Texas roads aren't California Freeways. Not even close.
She totally made it back well in time to pick up the kid and me . She even had time to stop at the outlet malls in San Marcos at like noon. No rain even. Kiddos to the MIL.

Monday, August 25, 2008

The good the bad and the rest

You get it all because well, I've been lagging and well, I'm too busy to post as often as I've had the ideas pop into my head. Really though I use the laptop at home and it's a Dell, the power cord died and costs $65 to replace and I'm too pissed at Dell for overcharging so I am not getting on the computer at home. BTW, the pics actually relate to the last paragraph so you'll have to bear with me before we get to those. I'll try to use paragraphs this time but no guarantees. As for the previous post ya'll can thank my lovely dh, he went back and put in the paragraph breaks. He knew I'd never go back and fix that. I'm more into burping up writings onto the pages than going back and making them actually legible. Yes, he has full access into everything of mine, and probably vice versa although strangely neither of us has abused the abilties. I just noticed him the other week going though my blog and was like, what are you doing, are you actually being nice to my readers because you know I would not go back and put paragraph breaks in. And he responds mmm hmmm or some such over his shoulder. So you guys can go over to his poor neglected, never updated blog and say thank you. Maybe it'll encourage him to update more often if he know someone is listening!

He's a wonderful writer but an even better listener. I've had girlfriends in the past go through divorces call me up on my cell phone and have the luck of me not being there and get him instead (lucky them!) and they would talk to him for hours. It probably did them much more good to talk to him (no lie) than to me anyway. I'd of course call them back but by that time the emotional crisis had passed and the dh had talked her through it and all was good in the world. Yup, I do keep him around for a reason. His excellent English skills, his ability to talk my girlfriends off of the teetering edge, and his public relations skills. All the things I am sorely lacking. Oh and his patience with children, I have very little of that too. As a side note, we are working on getting him back into the teaching field. We need to send all of his credentials to the state of Texas and have them evaluated, then wait for them to decide what he needs to do to be accredited in Texas, usually they make you pay several hundred dollars and take tests. We'll see if that pans out though. In the mean time he had an interview for some desk job in the local police department. Who knows, maybe that'll work.

This week the mother in law has been out for the kid who has started her first week of the first grade today. She was a bit nervous since most of her kinder class was not in her new class, I think she has 3 kids that she knows in this new class which is not bad considering there are 9 classes in her grade. Yeah, 9 classes of 22, insane isn't it? There are a lot of kids in this school district, they are opening an average of 8 new schools every year. This year they opened our local new high school. Next year we get another new elementary school and jr high. When that new elementary opens up our elementary is to be much less crowded, hopefully. We shall see. I'm hoping it means When the dh does get accredited it means there will be many more local jobs for him. There are so many families out here and unlike in So Cal where everyone who has a kid has one out here everyone has 3 or 4. Many kids, insane schools!

But moving on to the bad, or semi bad depending on how you look at it. I was almost ready to get moving at work. We were days away from getting started. Days, well maybe like 2 weeks, but that still can be measured in days! We had building permits (finally!) and everything. We were so close but no. We needed to exhaust my instrument (downstairs on the first floor) up through to the floor into the hood (second floor) and up through the roof. This proved to be too much of a pain so they are now changing the plans. Now we are going to move my entire mass spectrometer upstairs (and probably piss off the mass spec gods in the process) and expand my room by a factor of 3. That brand new reception area that I was going to take a small corner of (see pics above)? Yeah well I'm taking the entire area of now. Yup. The whole thing. It's mine, all mine. But of course that also means I will not be up and running for a good long time. I started working here at the end of May. I will not be actually working for um well maybe another 4 months? Maybe? I dunno. Until then I show up and play on the internet. Is it a good paycheck? Yes? With great bennies too. Is it stimulating? No, God I'm bored. I will not complain though. It's a paycheck with some awesome people.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

I can't feel my hands

It's one of those side affects of the Topamax. I may be able to shed this last med soon though, seems as though that migraine thing may not be a brain surgery side affect, may be instead due to the fact that my damn right Eustacian tube hasn't drained in oh, 3 months or so. Um, this body is defective, I need to trade it in for a new one. Can some one please tell me where the store is to do that? I'm sure Steve Jobs has figured that one out and patented it it by now, or maybe Gates, yeah? If not those boobs need to get back to it because they're laggin and seriously missing the boat.

Anyway I have a few shouts to put out there for the last few days. First and foremost to my friend Kim for taking the dd into her brood. Jon and Kate plus 8 got nothing on her. Since it's the last week before school starts it seems as though everyone has run out of day care, everyone is scrambling to get things done and she's the last at home mom left available to take care of kids. She's got 4 of her own (see the blog in my blog roll labeled Kimmie) so at any given moment this past week she's had 10+ kids at her home ranging from ages 2 to the occasional teen but mostly around age 5. Yeah you try that on your own and see how long you last. Not long? Yeah that's what I thought. So while you sit at whatever job you are at and think about how you'd love to be somewhere else you just think about Kim and suck it up and think about how you could be her little helper and say a little prayer for her and how it's a good thing you don't see her on today's front page of CNN yeah? Yeah.
So props out to you girl and thanks for taking care of my kid this week so she would continue to speak English and I didn't have to keep her with my mom. God don't get me started on that women.

Oh and for prop #2, and he's just going to be floored by this one cause he just never gets any props from me, this one goes out to the hubby. The mil is coming today. I am usually good about cleaning house when she comes out. We, like most full time working parents, are not good house keepers. We just aren't. I could probably come up with a thousand great excuses but I won't bore you with them since you could probably come up with the same ones too. They all result in the same thing, a messy unkept home of 2 adults, one kid and 3 dogs. Real world, real life, whatever. The addition of meds that make me not give a rats ass just make it so that the mil coming out makes me not even care to bother cleaning. Normally I'd at least get a burst of energy the day before but not this time. I have not gathered the motivation at all. None, nothing. No guilt. Now that's saying something. When my OCD's being affected, yeah, it's bad. So the dh has taken it upon himself to take care of the house himself. He took the day off today, thankfully since he's worked ot for the past 2 weekends and we've been left to own own devices and it's been bad, so that he can get the house in order today and pick his mom up from the airport. Which is good so that I don't have to take the hours off from work. So he deserves some credit for trying to make a decent presentation for his mother's visit. Props out to you babe.

I took a vacation day tomorrow so that we can have a family day and take care of the ungodly amount of stuff that we need to take care of. The back door, apparently , was installed incorrectly, so the builder has an "Extraction and Installation" scheduled for tomorrow. Doesn't that sound like a really bad medical procedure? Oh yeah and there's the dog's vet visit because that ear is not getting any better, definite yeast ear infection. Yup, needs meds and us to have the time to have to take her in. We are such bad doggie parents.

Those damn dogs have been driving me insane. The neighbors think I'm nuts. The dogs get put outside to go potty in the mornings and they won't. They stand at the back door and dig at the door to be fed. They dig and dig and dig and dig and just will not stop. Drives me insane. Like I'd forget to feed them. They get fed the exact same thing every single morning. With out fail. Even before I get fed. Ingrates. So when I am trying to get the kid fed it drives me insane to listen to them rip up my door. When I reach my point of just can't stand it any more I grab the 1 metal dog bowl that stays inside the house, open the door and bang it on the outside of the house on the brick and yell at them (the neighbors have just got to love this at 6:30 in the morning, they can't possible not notice it). Then I start lecturing them about the fact that their asses should not get fed before mine and what I really should do is start telling them about the types of guns we own. That'd really freak the neighbors out. Yeah, that'd be great. Yup, we'd get rid of the neighbors right quick. Well maybe not the FBI neighbor but the other ones would probably skidaddle like the Texas wusses they are. Don't let the talk fool ya, Texans are all talk and no action what so ever. Trish would be ok though, she's used to us and already got fair warning that it's just my meds talking. Her hubby probably fears me though. I think he heard me the other morning, I heard someone out there that morning, poor neighbor. Did it slow down my tirade, nope. It may have been their son too, poor child. He's probably used to it though, he's got 3 sisters, he'd better get used to it, just wait till they all hit puberty. Fun stuff. Not. Anyway, I freaked out some poor neighbor over their. Again. Probably wasn't the first or last time. The funny part was that now Jayne has decided it's a fun game of chase. Must be his meds. His must be way better than mine. The other two, the dumb ones who are actually doing the scratching at the door, are terrified of the banging metal bowls (so why do they keep scratching at the door?). FWIW I do not then go inside, get their food and feed them. I do not let them equate me coming out, making noise, and lecturing with the reward of food. No, I am a better dog trainer than that. I let them equate their door scratching with me and the noise and lecture. Does it work? The scratching has become much more sedate. It used to be a frantic incessant thing, now it's just a scratch and a 5 to 10 minute pause followed by another scratch. I want to get an electric fence thing and every time I get a scratch I shock the living crap out of them. That's not the meds talking, I am just a masochist like that.

Bastages ought to learn that the world does not revolve around them. They peed on the carpet upstairs one too many times. They no longer sleep upstairs now, oh no. They now sleep downstairs in their crates. I never thought it'd come down to it but low and behold it has. And wouldn't you know it my bedroom no longer smells like a barn. It's really nice. I do love my dogs but wow, a bedroom that doesn't smell like a barn, it's nice. And these dogs get bathed like twice a month and their beds are washed regularly and they are indoor dogs! So why do they make my bedroom smell like a barn?

Monday, August 18, 2008

I like this article

Read it, I'll comment later. I actually have to work today but I like this article so I figured I'd at least give ya'll something to ponder in the mean time. See I didn't for get you guys! I am here to entertain at the very least. I will come back and give you my thoughts on the matter at some point but since these people here do pay me stupid amounts of money to do absolutely nothing I will work when the occasion arises. Hehehe. It does come up. On rare occasion. More on that later too!

My foster dog from hell

I had spoken about her before, I was saved from her by an angel in the rescue I volunteer for. I have met and helped thousands of dogs in my life. I was a vet tech through my college years and have owned and fostered many emotionally/mentally/physically damaged dogs so I've met my share. But this one and I, we did not click. I was so ready to chuck her off the nearest cliff it was a good thing Texas is flat boy howdy let me tell you. I have never met a dog that I really just did not like until I met Petter. I was ready to like her, she should have been an easy foster but she wasn't. Nope, she was pure unmitigated hell. We had her for a total of maybe 3 weeks before the woman in charge of the review crew (who lives in CO) had her neighbor's co-worker who was doing some business in Houston change his return flight to fly out of San Antonio instead of Houston, rent a car, drive from Houston, pick up Petter, and fly her to CO. My Knight in Shining Armor, no lie. I never met the man, we had her placed in another temp foster home a week before he came in because I was ready to have her euthanized (she was biting me and my 6 yr old and keeping us up all night screaming, gaaah) and the rescue could have cared less, do not get me started about how good they are about supporting their volunteers, ugh. But it's not like I don't believe that these dogs don't deserve a good home. Petter came to us from a military home. A mom with an army husband that was going to be deployed for 18 months, 3 young children, one with medical problems that had to be hospitalized often. And Petter was a seizure dog that often had to be hospitalized to get her seizures under control. This dog did not belong in a military home that was moving often, that was for sure. The mom had problems letting go of her and I could totally understand that but it was definitely better for all of them, dog and family. Mom was not well versed in epilepsy, I spent some time on the phone with her discussing the disease and she told me about the last time Petter had bad seizures (when they flew back from Germany) and I was like, well, of course, stress, duh. She had no clue that stress caused seizures. I wanted to reach through the phone and smack her upside the head. Well I couldn't and lets face it the woman had 3 young children and one with medical problem so she really did not have the time for a dog with medical problems. What she really needed was to think before she bought the damn dog. If you aren't capable of handling a special needs dog for the love of god don't buy a frenchie. They are a high maintinace breed, trust me, not a mutt breed. These people, just buying it because it's cute, dumbasses. So Petter, why an I rambling on about Petter today? Because on Friday her forever home was approved by the board of directors. A mom that is a vet tech in Nebraska of all places. A home with 2 bosti siblings and no children in the home to harass her and get bitten. FWIW my child never gave her reason to bite her, and yes, my dd is very dog savvy, remember Jaynie is a nutter dog and is special needs. The dd knows what it's like to live with a special needs autistic dog that needs very little excuse to bite. Her favorite show on tv is not a cartoon, her favorite show is It's me or the dog, I may be going to parent hell but my kid will know canid behavior and positive reinforcement training like nobody's business let me tell you. She comes running down those stairs when she hears Victoria's british accent, it's hilarious. "Is that the trainer is that the trainer?" is all she squeals as she comes flying down stairs. So she did get something other than my small ocds it seems.
Anyway Petter is in her new home now, she is happy and I am happy for her. Unlike the puppy mill dogs the end of her long road is not celebrated as loudly as theirs and yet I feel as though it should be. It's as if I feel she was just as down trodden and emotionally traumatized as they were, I saw it in her face and felt it in her heart. I know she was I did see it there and boy was she close to death. She never once had a seizure in my care but she had her blood levels drawn once she made it CO and apparently her Phenobarbitol (anti seizure meds , yeah, sedative, pretty depressive stuff boy let me tell ya about them suckers..) levels were at like 3 times the level she needs, um yuck! Yet you knew she was not happy, she was off, she was not right in the head. Now that I've been on antiseizures at overdose levels I know why she was freaking out and biting and just not the happy camper. While in CO they changed her meds, she did seize a few times but she was an entirely different dog. Happy, content, and just a dog. Lord forbid she get to be a dog! I was happy that she got a chance to just be a dog but still, her journey was not ended, she was not yet in her forever home. It could have been but it was not. So last Friday her journey ended and I am happy for her. Even though the entire time I knew her all I really wanted to do was pop her head off and chuck it across the back yard. Yup, today I am sentimental about the only dog I ever hated. Congrats on your new forever home Petter, have a nice life, glad I didn't end it abruptly, it was a very close one dog.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Austin, my love hate relationship

I can relate to the city of Austin, as most southern Californians can. It is very much like my home city of San Diego. It is like one big downtown and no suburbia. It has a night life, hip nifty cafes, all kinds of city life, loft living, people out exercising, high rises, things you just do not see in San Antonio. People in San Antonio would rather lay down their fat asses and die before walking or having a bike ride or pulling a row boat or, lord forbid, exerting energy, no no, not here. So like I said, Austin is much more of what I am used to in a city, an active, young metropolis not filled with morbidly obese lazy wannabe drugstore cowboys that have never touched a bovine or equine in the flesh in their entire lives. It is an 80 mile hour long drive for me though so sadly I do not go very often, only if I have a darn good excuse with the price of gas lately. It's been almost a year since we've gone I think. Well the kid and I have been into hooping lately and there's a group of hoopers that get together up there once a month and practice and go over a move or two. So this Sunday was the day, the dh was working ot all weekend and he suggested that we go and have a girl bonding day together, I wasn't going to but ok, whatever. I suppose that's what I get for thinking right? My success rate for an Austin run is at about 50%, even when I Mapquest before we go we can only find the place 50% of the time. This time I didn't even have an address. It was 'the corner of 4th and whatever st.'. I did Mapquest it and it did give me an area but when I printed it out Mapquest saw fit to not print out the area I had centered on, it only wanted to print out the exact corner of the two streets. Technology, it will be the death of me. Mapquest knows best of course and would not let me zoom out a bit more and print so that I could get a bit more of the map in relative to the freeway so that is what I was stuck with. On with the trip we went then, all 80 miles up to Austin, whiny kid and "Are we there yet?'. She did not shut up the whole way. She prattled on the entire way, would not shut up. I managed to find one of the streets by the time we made it up there. Couldn't find the other. With out an address of course I really couldn't narrow it down of course. Ended up in a seedier section of town, the kid asked why all the houses looked abandoned, I told her it was a lower income neighborhood. She started whining again and I after about 20 minutes of me telling her that she was lucky she was not living in that neighborhood I told her she was going to be left on a corner and she could walk home. It shut her up for a whole 3 minutes. No, make that 2. I should really not listen to the dh any more, his ideas about me and the dd having bonding days that include 80+ mile away drives are just all around bad ideas. I really know better, it does nothing but damage the relationship between me and the kid. This evening I now open my mouth and she flinches. Special trips and hobbies like this just need to exclude the kid.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Certified GEEK household, the lot of us

Oh yeah, I know the dh and I are, no big, knew this from the get go. I learned how to read because my dad took me to the comic book stores with him from the age of 4. I had my own comic book subscription at the age of 8 (Elfquest) and I have a degree in chemistry. Yeah, I earned the certification. The dh and I hooked up though meeting often at Dungeon and Dragons games, do you get the gist? He's way worse than I am, I won't even bother going into the details of his dorkness, he owns a kilt and has the audacity to wear it in Texas, need I say more? What I didn't realize is the level to which it had spilt over onto the kid. She got a call from her friend today to find out what teacher she had got for 1st grade this year. DD began to tell her about the Star Wars Clone Wars movie that her daddy had taken her to yesterday. Now I realize that my dd is a prattler, she will talk forever and not shut up. She needs no topic, she will talk about nothing at all and drive a person insane. She had a kid she spent some time with over he summer and he started to pinch her and leave bruises because he just couldn't take it any more. Not that I condone such behavior but I really can understand where he came from, it can drive a person to homicide. It's bad. Anyway she she was going on about this movie that her girlfriend probably had no interest in whatsoever. She then decides that she needs to go into detail. Great detail. So she gets into her daddy's books. As in Star Wars Role Playing Game Ultimate Alien Anthology. Note 1) She knows where it is (this is saying something, daddy has like minimum 50 gaming books spread all over the house 2)She knows what she is looking for in the book and 3) she knows that it exists in this particular book and 4) she doesn't know how to read yet so she has to get me to read the alien names but hey, they aren't exactly in English (alien remember?) so I can cut the girl some slack on this one. Now all this time she's flipping through the book her poor gf is waiting on the other end of the line and all I can think of is when you're on message boards and people are posting saying "This thread is useless without PICTURES" you know what I'm talking about? There is a 6 yr old girl on the other end of the line here and my dd is describing Star Wars alien clones with out actually describing what they look like. Not even what the story line was. I took pity on her and told the dd to invite her friend over to play tomorrow and show her pictures and that her friend probably had to go. So the poor thing was released from what was probably the most dull phone conversation of her entire short life thus far and will probably forever more pass the phone to her older dorky brother (who happens to love Star Wars Clone Wars) every time my dd gets on the phone. Which, oddly, my dd probably won't mind. Strange how that works isn't it?

Friday, August 15, 2008

Sea Foam Green

It's not my favorite color by any means, but I didn't buy the house either so who am I to say what color to paint it? If I am going to be picky with what color my neighbor's house is to be then I will buy a house within an HOA neighborhood. I will not call the police, smear dog poop on the fence, nor put a dead rabbit on the lawn. But then again, I am not that kind of wuss ass pussy. Get real, if you've got an issue then move away. And for God's sake, use your brain, don't get into a pissing contest with your neighbor because I will tell you what, if my neighbor gets into a pissing contest with me bad bad things will go down. None of this little piss ant dog poop dead bunny shit oh no no. Classic that all this conservative crap is going on in So Cal too now isn't it? And here all the rest of the US always thought of the area as being so laid back. Oh no people, let me tell you, with all of the military that goes in and out of there and the retirees that settle down there Cali is not so laid back. They have plenty of uptight asses to spare. Yeah there's plenty of surfers and drunk students too but old people abound too so you'll see a lot of this crap being doled out. There aren't a lot of HOA's around any more though, the neighborhoods close to the coast especially, mostly because those are old neighborhoods. You go to the newer hoods, inland, and you will find some HOA's but for the most part they expired decades ago are are a thing of the long past. Regardless I just could not pass up a blog rant about these people and their behavior towards their new neighbor and her children just because they don't like the color she chose to paint her house. Like I said, if they wanted to control the color of their neighbor's house why in the world are they living in a neighborhood where they don't have that kind of control. Shit heads, I swear.

Feeling pretty good this morning

Probably for no particular reason other than the fact that I can feel like me a little bit again. Yeah, I know, it's Friday but my dh is working all weekend and I have to clean the friggin house by myself (well, with a 6 yr old too, ick) in preparation for the mil coming next week. So no, the impending weekend does not make me happy. Other than that I am in a peppy mood. I do not have the usual drag and doom gloom hanging over my head that I usually have. Must be the med level going down. That didn't take long. Good thing too or you'd guy would have been recognizing my face on the front page of CNN. My dh is a gun buff, we've got lotsa ammo too. And not enough gun safes. The ammo is kept totally separate from the guns you paranoid parents but I know where enough is at to cause damage. This is Texas and we've got castle laws here, I'm legally allowed to kill people walking on my scorched lawn if I so desire. This ain't California, we have a fast lane for our Death Row in these here parts. Hehehe. Stupid hippies. If ya'll had to spend an evening hanging out in the So Cal town I was raised in you'd understand the animosity I harbor for it. People from San Diego hear that I'm from Ocean Beach and they say "WHAT?" only because they are astonished that adults had the audacity to raise a child there. It's not known for it's nurturing atmosphere, more like it's all engulfing pot cloud. And we wonder why my brain had a birth defect...really now.
Just the kind of person that ya'll want access to guns with lotsa ammo to huh? Well that's what America was created for. Fully medicated and totally armed people. You don't like it move to Australia. I think most of the unmedicated freaky people already live there anyway, go on! Git! See, I'm doing much better, feeling totally great. Oh! I totally forgot to mention I went to see a regular plain old GP doctor yesterday too for my weird ear problem. Turns out my Eustachian tubes aren't draining. Haven't been for months. And they haven't gotten infected. Huh, lucky me. I would have expected them to rot out or something knowing my health luck at this point. I mean hell my brain exploded at age 34, why did my Eustachian tubes hold out liquid filled for 3 months and not have some sort of hissy fit? Eh well I won't kick that gift horse in the mouth. So normally the doc would give a steroid shot and steroid nasal spray but she didn't want add to my already fun cocktail of meds I was on so we went with just the steroid nasal spray. I could pop my ears within an hour of using the spray. I haven't been able to do that for like 2 months. It felt odd. But better. See, I told you I'm feeling better!
Nothing like getting off of mood meds and onto steroids to make a woman happy.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

An interesting little surprise

That 'new' used cars can sometimes be. The dh's co-worker, Mr. F, an older, very very nice man, has decided to kind of take the dh under his wing and help him out with a few car things. This week it was with making the new used car more fuel efficient car. Mr F decided they needed to do an oil change (which I fully agree with) so he went out and got some synthetic oil and an oil filter and had my dh come over to his house. The dh went over this morning with the kid and Mr F had his 2 grandsons/ gear heads do the oil change and evaluate the car. The oil in the car was total nastiness so it's a good thing they pulled it out. Also, and this was the interesting surprise, the engine in the '97 Honda Accord was not a '97 engine. Nope, turns out it was an '03 engine. Fancy that. Someone dropped an '03 Honda Accord engine in this car. Well, well, so here we thought this engine had a hundred plus miles on it. Doubt it. Seriously doubt it. Nope I think it has way fewer miles on it than that. Yeah I think it has less than 50k on it. I know the body is original, it has all the same matching stamped numbers on the inside. We plan on making a few under the hood changes, K&N air filter, splitfire spark plugs, changing the oil again in 3k rather than 5k since the oil was so dang nasty last time. We will treat this engine very nice to keep it live, this is the way of older cars. Keep them pampered and they will survive nice, don't and they will kick off fast.
BTW, all this rambling about the dh's car, you're probably wondering why it's on my blog and not the dh's right? I was raised by my dad, dh was raised by his mom. I am a gear head, he is not. If our car was to suddenly break down by the side of the road and someone was to pop the hood bets would have it I would be the one to crawl under that hood. That's just the way things roll in this family. I've spent more time under the hood of a car than he has, I like cars, they're fun. Plus I've listened to my dad prattle on about them for decades. The only reason I stopped doing my own oil changes is because disposing of your own oil is a pain in the ass and almost costs as much as paying for an oil change. I can also change brake pads but rear ones are a pain, I don't do rear ones. No saying I could get a dead car to run, just saying I could make a few educated guesses. Just saying I like cars.


I can do it...sometimes. OK I am better at it than most. Not as good as others, better than most men. Not so good in the mornings and terrible while walking so I'll usually stop walking so as not to embarrass myself, because I know I will. This morning I exited my car to walk to my building, gathered my things and looked down at my phone. Oh crap, 2 missed phone calls and a txt from last night. Fook fook fook. I hate that. I keep my phone in my purse at home so if you try and get a hold of me while I'm at home by my cell bets have it I won't answer. Sad but true. I can't hear it in my house, the purse is a Harvey's seat belt bag, it's a small cute little thing but the seat belts are real seat belts and thick ie very sound insulative! So yeah, I missed it, my bad. Sooo, I'm walking, or stumbling rather, down the road towards my building and trying to txt my friend in SD (6am her time so I don't expect and answer). Lo and behold an answer comes popping back. She, unlike me, actually gets up early enough to prepare herself for work. I really just stumble out of bed bust into and out of the shower, clothe myself, and stumble right on into the car. Yeah just be happy you're not in the way of my morning commute.
So I get an answer and must stop now and continue typing and now now think. I am sure to get hit by a car walking to work because damn San Antonio drivers can't drive worth a shit and is it just me or are 95% of all nurses phillipinos? Not a one of which can drive worth a damn. Scary people who should never ever be allowed behind a wheel. Ever. But that's ok because I was here and the drama was...there. And all I had to was step out of the road and type and the drama was still there and I? I was still here. In the heat. And not, not in the drama. Yup, I may be 1500 miles away from my friends that I do dearly love but I am also 1500 miles away from the friends that I would kick the fat asses of if I were that close to. His, not hers, just to be clear there. And the good news? I didn't fall flat on my face and was still able to semi-coherently txt back. Semi. Kinda. Well she knew what I was talking about and that's all that mattered. My day is complete. I'd like to go home now. Thanks bye! Do you think they'd notice? Sadly I don't think so. No love I'm telling you! No love!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

We have phone contact!

After 3 weeks of phone calls I finally got the neurologists office to call me back. I ran out of drugs. Oh and some how lost my copies of the refills she gave me. I do that sometimes. I lose my brain sometimes too but that's the norm. I got a call back from the doctor telling me that my Topomax levels are fine and I can be weaned off of the Keppra (YAY!) and so I will wean myself off over 3 weeks. BTW, my Keppra levels are actually high, yay again, may explain why I am freakishly extra whakadoodledoo too. 3 weeks though and I can be off, whooo hooo! I am so ready to be off this crap. My family is ready too, you believe me right? Damn psycho meds. I mean I understand that they don't want me seizing, I do really. But I have never seized, I have had all the tests that show that I am not a seizure risk and damn it I am over medicated on the drug anyway. Sheehowdy all the side affects are driving me batty and I'm almost catatonic and homicidal. Helllooo people! Get me off this crap! OK, getting off of my soap box now in a mildly appreciative manner, 3 more weeks. I wonder how long it takes to fully get out of ones system?...

So many people don't know how to 'wing it'

I do, I could say it's a talent but it's really not. Maybe it's just something I learned along the way, I dunno, but really it's something that has, many many many times, come in handy. I came across an article today that actually describes how to wing it. How nice of them to explain it! No really, you should read it! OK I'm bored, I still haven't anything to do at work so I might as well come up with entertaining things for you folk to read, right? And anyway winging it is fun. It is, you should try it...and then come back here and tell me how it worked. Especially if you're single and you try it out on someone at a bar or something adventurous like that. I don't think I ever did that as a single person. Wait lemme think, how did I meet new, I was always introduced somehow through friends. How boring of me. OK if I had to go up to someone at a bar and introduce myself I can honestly say I seriously doubt I'd have issues with it and no, I don't think I'd have any reservations. Any friends out there of mine who think other wise feel free to comment, bets have it they won't. I told Jas yesterday that if he'd buy me a set of boobs I'd let him drive me down the freeway while I pressed them up against the window nekked. There, does that tell you about my unabashed reservations? Yeah there ya go, married woman asking random men for a set of boobs to share on highway. Alright then. Read the article. If you don't already know how to, learn to wing it. And let me know if it actually works! The article that is, not if asking Jas for a set of boobs succeeds. I'll get back to you on that one.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

I try, really I do!

I came home, took care of the dogs, cleaned the yard, worked out a bit (yeah, I know it must be that damned anorexia right?) and made dinner. Cooked dinner, fancy that! And you know what, I'm so tired I feel like I could just puke. I bet my blood sugar is too low dang it. I drank juice but I'm one of those low blood sugar people. Funny since I work with a bunch of diabetics, they must hate me I swear. They have to watch every thing that passes their lips that could may eventually turn into a sugar (like bread I would rather die being the bread addict that I am) and here I am feeling ill because my blood sugar is too low. I even have proof, I had my blood levels taken last week right after lunch and my glucose was smack dab in the middle of normal. Totally not where they should have been. They should have been sky high. Nope, mid normal. Had I been fasting (which is what I should have been doing when having my blood chemistries drawn) it would have probably been stupid low. That's why I am constantly snacking a work. And constantly freezing. I swear it's like a meat locker in there.
So anyway I was trying to save my day and end it on an up note. Make myself work out, release some endorphins, and eat healthy by making dinner. And just ended up by burning myself out. Why did I even bother getting up this morning? Stupid stupid move.

I'm having a moment of clarity!

I was chatting (on G-chat) with a gf yesterday and was telling her about Attack of the Redneck Mommy, a blogger that she had not read yet. She said that her style reminded her of me. I didn't quite know if I should be offended or flattered. I didn't think I was quite that crude, or redneck? I mean my dad is navy, he did raise me on his own, he did make up his own swear words when he ran out of the standard ones (yes it does happen when you over abuse them, Navy guys can understand this). Yet I never considered myself redneck. I was raised in a very urban culture, 7th largest city in the US, very urban, very 'hip', no country. At all. Certainly no redneck, no no, must drive very very far away for redneck.
So last night I mentioned to the dh that my gf has said this and he commented that maybe it was true and that he has not been bothered by anything that I said on my blog and that I don't censor. Alright then, that being said all bets are off boys and girls and any form of censorship that I thought I had been using is now officially gone. Careful for what you wish for honey. and here you thought I hadn't been holding back, huh yeah sure right.
So you all have known that these lovely meds that I have been fighting to be off have now been wreaking havock with my not so stable mental stability for a few ok not so few months now are peaking. Oh yeah this morning was soooo much fun. The kid was at home last night so my mom came this morning to pick her up and take care of her, damn I hate my mom. Turns out the dd had had a melt down yesterday and my mom can't handle kids melting down. She couldn't when I was a kid, she can't now. She solves this problem the same way now as she did then, she tells the kid that they are a horrible person and that they are terrible and that no one likes them and that no one ever will. This goes on for quite some time and she screams and yells and she goes into a lovely demon mode and can't be talked down from it and eventually she just has to be left alone. It has a long term affect on the child usually and I went through most of my childhood believing her, I mean who wouldn't, right? She should have never been allowed to have a child, her leaving me when I was 8 was the best thing she ever did for me in her entire life. Why the hell my dad ever let her back in is beyond me, he's such a pushover. Anyway, FWIW I have arranged for another gf of mine to take care of my dd next week (thanks Kim!). So I have this lovely morning trying to get out of my house with my mom there and it doesn't go so well but I do get out, a bit late but I do get out. I get down the road a ways and realize that damn I forgot to take my meds. GAH. So I turn around and go back. To find my kid alone on the couch. Ask her where my mom is. The answer? I dunno. Great. I see her eventually. Out back standing with one of the dogs. OK fine. Too bad the kid doesn't even know where the freakish grandmother is. I tell the kid where that woman is so she knows, make sure she has everything she needs, take my meds and leave for work, even later than I already was. Gotta love that time clock. I hope she keeps it together today, I don't know if my mother can, she's just not that stable. Freak of nature that she is. If you're wondering what the kid's problem is, the dh has been working overtime and she misses her daddy. She's also seeing the side affects of my meds and watching me trying to hold it together which I'm not good at. Oh and since the dh isn't around to help, well that's fun too. He thinks by working over time it makes it better. Funny how that's a vicious cycle. The money may help, next month, maybe? In the meantime, no?
So this little Tramadol medication/dh anecdote I thought ya'll might find amusing, I have lost 4 pounds in the last 4 weeks but I'm sure that's just stress. DH told me 2 nights ago he liked the weight I was at when I left the hospital. So I guess I should have brain surgery more often. That is just so what you should tell your wife when she's medically induced emotionally morbid and 20lbs heavier than when she came out of the hospital right? He's got great timing. Maybe I should stop having sex with him until I lose the extra weight. Do you think that will get him to appreciate what he has rather than wanting something skinnier? No? Shall I try and find out? Yes? I think so too. I am not happy either, we should both suffer. Boys and their stupid penises should learn to appreciate what they don't have to have if we don't think they need to have it. Like I'm so fat at this weight. And I have to suck it up and be nice and have his mother out next week as it is. While on these awesome depressing meds. While he thinks I'm too fat. Don't even get me started. Why do women get maried? Remind me again? I mean it's not for the money, I earn almost twice as much and I carry the bennies. I do the bills. I take care of the kid and the dogs. Why do I keep him around? To remind me that I'm over weight? Shit my mom does a fine job of that and even if she doesn't I'm sure I could just look in a mirror. I was, after all, raised in So Cal. Go ahead remind me again....

Monday, August 11, 2008

Called the neurologists office today...

Just for those of you who are keeping track. And are nosey about such mundane things, and no Corbies smooshed face has nothing to do with anything at all, just thought you'd like to look at it. Plus I have nothing else of any excitement going on to blather about. Sorry, it's Monday and I am boring today. The most exciting thing going on is the construction truck that drove past me on my walk this morning had it's gas tank punched trough with a chunk of metal. It was spilling diesel out onto the blacktop by the gallons I swear it was like watching $20 bills sinking into the ground. Interesting sight.
But back to that phone call I made this morning...I got the lab results in for my blood work. I know because I had a copy faxed to me here at my work by the lab (one of the benies of working at a dr's office. What you think I was going to count on the neurologist's nurse calling me and telling me they came in? Sure, riiight. My neurologist has not actually looked at them yet, of course. It's Monday morning so this is not some huge surprise to me at all. Regardless I figured I'd get the ball rolling by pissing off the nurse by telling her things she didn't want to hear. Who, me, piss in the nurses Cheerios on a Monday morning? Naw...that's not something I would do! I mean really what is that woman going to do, put me on list of the last person to call? Like she calls me back at all! So I told her that I wanted to be taken off of all of my meds. Period. All of them. I don't want to be on anything. She said she didn't think that was a good idea. I said that she wasn't the doctor. Oh she must LOVE me. Damn I am good. What that does do though is pretty much guarantee me a call from the doctor and not the stupid ass bitch nurse. And even if that nurse does try and call me back with an answer of some sort I will still most likely end up having to talk to the doctor anyway regardless of what the nurse has to say. Pretty rotten of me forcing their hand and making them have the doctor talk to me rather than the lackey. You know they hate that. They hate the fact that they have me as a patient at all. They are an epilepsy exclusive practice and I don't have epilepsy. I am a lowly stroke survivor patient. They only accepted me because I was specifically referred by a respected neurosurgeon. Otherwise they would have told me to piss off, which, might I add, I would have gladly done had I known how much fun they'd be to work with....

Saturday, August 9, 2008

We're going to change the way you stamp!

Boy howdy you just don't even know...
No really, you don't. The couple that created Unity Stamps knew exactly what they were doing, they originally started out by making the full wood mounts for wood mounted rubber stamping companies. They knew there was a ton of wood waste going on and don't even talk to me about the storage issues so they came up with a whole new system to use with red rubber stamps and a sort of wood mount on acrylic block system. Yeah it sounds odd but it's beyond perfect. Really. Beyond. Yeah, change the way I stamp, understatement of the century. It's great, they make it so the red rubber stamps are unmounted but kind of mounted. They can be mounted but are not so they are easily stored in a variety of ways without taking up and ungodly quantity of space. Plus you don't have to go out and order a bunch of EZ Mount like I did when buying Bella Stamps. Which I do love but it's all just one style of stamp.
I never thought I'd be into stamping. I started out as a scrapbooker. Never wanted to get anywhere near stamping. I had friends that were stampers (see the link over there in my list, labeled Ponine, she's presently the bento box fiend). I've seen the stash, that took over drawers and drawers of storage because of the sheer volume alone I did not want to get near the stamping obsession. And the price of shipping, no way! So my first toe into the stamping world was at the Scrapbook Expo. I was introduced to Technique Tuesday, a fabulous clear acrylic high quality very nice stamp company that avoided my whole wood mounted stamp phobia. They were very pretty too. Unfortunately they were are also very expensive. Um and did I also mention that acrylics have their own issues? Yeah they don't image well. Now mind you out of all the acrylic stamps out there TT probably images the absolute best and their inks work the best with acrylics but almost no store carries them and again, very expensive. So I was still left with the fact that I love the storage of acrylics but the lack of a clean crisp image that I love of a red rubber stamp. In comes unmounted rubber. Love it but it's unmounted. OK, EZ mount it and I'm happy! Not perfect but still happy. Really, red wood mounted rubber gives the best, cleanest images and that's just all there is to it. They just suck to store and are too expensive to buy and ship. Alright then what's the answer? Well until Unity arrived there wasn't one.
I was introduced to Stampin Up mid 2007 and I liked them fine, bought a few used stamps sets because I just could not stand the prices and shipping. Eventually I bought a few of the less expensive sets and a few other little odds and ends. Enough to stay in the group but really not a big SU follower. Quality stuff, just too expensive and who has the storage space?! I became a member of Split Coast Stampers so I could buy used SU stamp sets that have retired and check out the gallery to see what people have made with sets. The problem was that they are the worst enablers in the entire world over there! I'd see a thousand things over there that I just had to have! So I figured out how to avoid the whole problem of being enabled but still being able to have fun on the forums. I only go over to the Unity subsection of SCS. Isn't that horrible, when I am so into a hobby that I can't even stand going over and seeing the bazillion things that I just cannot buy because I haven't even been able to even get to the stuff I already own. What I really need to do is just organize all the stuff I already have. I practically already own a scrapbooking store if I just looked! Ugh, time, all I need to do is find the time and be left alone in my own little space. Not going to happen is it?

Nuts and Butts

Don't worry, this post does not come with pictures. Not like I wouldn't put them up if I had them but I don't so your retinas are spared. If you haven't noticed I am not one to spare ya'lls retinas...and yet you keep coming back. The dh worked over time Saturday and as you know he's a corrections officer at a max security prison. This is his first time with working overtime so now we know what kind of job they give you when you show up for ot, they call it nuts and butts. What does that mean you ask? Wellll, it's strip searches for visitations. What, you think they just get to go in, visit and go back in the cells? Oh no no no, at least not at max security, I suspect not at min securities as well but I dunno. Regardless I'll get more details once the kid goes to sleep (please people, we spare the 6 yr old much of the details of what her daddy sees and does at work) but I do know that there are convicts out there who have tattoos on their penises and nuts. Helloooo, why? I mean really why in the world would one want to? Plus damn, that really must have stung.
Yes we do have an interesting household. My hubby's hair is cut by a convict, his uniforms are washed and pressed by one, and his boots are polished by one too. Really, how many of you out there can say the same about stuff hanging or sitting in your closet? Weird to think about huh? Just what did that man that touched your husband's clothing and cut your hubby's hair do to get locked up? Did he kill somebody? It probably wasn't a drug deal that went bad, those guys are at a different prison west of us here, a minimum security that was the hubby's original post. The CO's try not to find out about what the convicts did to get in there, it makes them treat them differently and they don't want to know or do that. But that stuff is sitting in my closet and it kinda makes me nosey. I mean wouldn't it make you nosey?

The hubby's new adventure

So my gf has been into making bento boxes for herself and her son. I consider her to be much more creative and enthusiastic than myself (ok and saying that about my medicated self right now isn't saying much I know, but still). I showed my hubby some links to some darn cute bento boxes that I knew he'd love and he showed the dd and she loved them too. This then led to the inevidable I want one and her daddy looking at the links that I began to show him of all the cute little things that Japanese mothers make for their children's lunches. Oh the Japanese and their artful food making skills, wow. He wants to do this now. Well more power to the man. He did, last school year, make her peanut butter and jelly sushi roll sandwiches. Has anyone tried this before? I have, not so easy. You have to pound the bread flat, cut the crust off, put a thin layer of peanut butter and jelly on and when you roll it make sure the top layer does not slide off of the bottom layer. He got very good at it, me, not so much. So I have looked around a bit and located the local asian markets but they haven't any children's bento boxes so we're going to have to go online for those and the onigiri rice shapers like the ones pictured above (hello kitty of course). Our friend Danae is going to be visiting Austin next month so we'll be driving up there to see her. There are some asian markets up there too so we might try hitting those up and seeing if there is any more variety in their stores. Bets have it there are, it's a much more hip town than San Antonio. San Antonio is deeply set in it's "We are podunk and we like it like that" ways, regardless of it's 7th largest city in the United States status. Buncha redneck fatass morons that just can not drive off of the ranch that has not existed for at least 200 years. Shit heads, wake up and smell the smog! That fat thing, you see next to you, it's not a cow, it's your neighbor....

Friday, August 8, 2008

Texas is big, and parking at my work is not

My writing is circuitous, if you haven't noticed by now. But I always bring around don't I? Have a little faith people! Let's start of with the little things. The building I work in is technically owned by Christus Santa Rosa, one of the local hospitals in the Medical Centers. DGD just leases the buildings from them. Now when the owner of DGD decided to expand and create a research center with 100 beds for patients in a whole separate 4 story building next door (that was spun off last year into a different entity) many more employees were now placed in our immediate vicinity. Wow, more parking spots were now needed, fancy that! So they are building us a new parking lot. The down side? Now you knew there would be one right? We came to work Monday and they had closed half of our own parking lot and didn't tell us where we could park in the mean time. All right ok fine. So we parked in the far side of patient parking for the day. Patient parking is never full and we didn't fill it up anyway. And the bastages started towing us around noon. Yeah, nice. To be expected of course. No notification or anything, no alternatives, nothing, just a tow. Gotta love hospital methodology. Totally unsurprising. Anyway yesterday they directed us into weird spots to park and then ticketed us during lunch (?). Why tell us to park someplace that they are going to ticket us, who knows. Anyway on the ticket (that has no price to pay) they noted where they want us to park. In a parking garage. OK fine dandy doodle, no problem with me. They don't charge money for this parking garage and it's covered so I'm happy. No one else is because it's too far (insert whine here).
Now is where I will bring in that curve of the Texas is big circle. Oh no boys and girls, I am not talking about the size about the land here I'm talking about the size of the PEOPLE. These people are, across the board, morbidly obese. Or just fucking fat. Lets call a spade a spade, these people are fat fat fat and working at a diabetes clinic I have some serious job security. Hell half these people working in here are diabetic, 80% are fat and on a "diet" (using the term loosely here). So when they were told they'd have to park in the parking garage about 800 yards away they had a little wee bit of a hissy fit. It's sooo faar! they whined like the fat little bitches they are. Wow,you know, the area I sit in is really super cold. I call it the meat locker. I still don't have what I need to do my job so I just sit all day and play on the computer so I get up and take a walk at least twice a day. Over to the helicopter pad and back to get my blood moving and get feeling back in my hands and feet. It's a really really short walk (5 minutes total maybe?) but it's long enough that I can feel my feet again. Guess what's on the other side of the heli pad? The parking garage! Don't get me started. Little whiny bitches....
Good lord what will they do when they have to deal with real life when a doctor tells them they are dying and they have to exercise or they will die? Let me guess, they will just lay down on their fat asses and DIE.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

We got rid of the Mustang

Thank God. We hated that thing. For the record it was it was an 05 Mustang, (yes the new style), 5 speed, we paid it off and really hated it. Bought it new, and it had died within the first 24 hours of us buying it. It sat for no less than 6 weeks in the shop while they waited for parts and we drove a pos Chevy Cavalier rental (oh damn that thing sucked) supplied by the Ford dealership. Within 2 months of us getting it back some guy destroyed the front end of that Mustang as the dh drove through a green light, the guy decided he was going to make a left turn in front of him. Did a good $15k worth of damage, the insurance should have technically totalled the car but that didn't really come to light until we had to take it back to the body shop the third of fourth time. Starting to get why we hate this car? It never was quite right again, really, how could it be? Anyway that's why the Mustang had such loooow milage, it was always in the shop, we never got the chance to drive the damn thing. And given the choice we'd rather drive the other car (automatic) anyway, sticks are great for teens but we're in our 30's and lazy, screw that whole stick shift thing. Plus hey, I'm 5'1" and that car is made for tall people, I can barely see over the steering wheel much less reach the damn pedals and don't even talk to me about engaging the damn clutch. Damn suicide machine for me. And yes I can drive a stick, who do you think taught the dh how to drive a stick when he was 16? In the San Diego Zoo parking lot thank you very much. I do not take credit for his psycho driving though, that's all his mom's fault. One trip with his mom driving is all it takes for a person to figure that one out.
Regardless we knew after this job of his with the stupid 168 mile round trip commute that the ever so gas efficient and fun to drive stick shift that the Mustang was not the most practical of cars. It is payed off though so we also were not looking to incur another car payment so what we wanted was some beater gas efficient car that we could do an even swap with that would last us long enough (at least a year) so the dh could find another job and if we needed to, get him another car or keep this one and still be practical. We looked at a Mazda 3 but they were too expensive (wow I did not know they were just under $20k, when the hell did that happen) so we went out looking at some used Hondas. Don't even think about mentioning American cars to me when I am talking used/reliable/and gas efficient all in the same sentence, I'm obviously going Japanese here people. So Honda it was. We ended up with an older Honda Accord (the special edition model in this write up) with many more miles on it than the Mustang. Strangely it doesn't even bother me in the slightest. It cost us $6400 and we will be getting a check in the mail for the difference in the trade in value of the Mustang. Not much but it'll pay a few bills this month and lord forbid if anything needs to be done on the car. Hey, I'm just being paranoid, shit happens right?
And the Mustang? Good riddance. Not even the kid misses that car and she always misses the cars we trade in. Always! Bye bye horsey car!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Psycho doctor's nurse update

Well at least I didn't have to post her number up here and have you all call her to drive her to returning my phone call (which, for the record, she did not). I called back this morning and had the luck of the nurse herself answering the phone. Instead of the scary mullet receptionist. No lie, the scariest man mullet you'll ever see on a woman. I'm not so sure I'd say she's a nice woman but she's just so scary to look at I can't get over it. Anyway I talked to the nurse and she's having me pull my blood today for my medicine levels and we'll then (hopefully) start weaning me off of the Keppra asap. Of course that doesn't mean I'll return to my version of sanity but who knows, maybe I will. Maybe I won't. One can only hope. In the mean time I am only down a few tubes of blood and a couple of holes in my arms, not bad for me.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Looking for some motivation

Because I haven't any. I can't decide whether it's the economy, where we are stuck at in life (and let's face it, every one is in a bad financial mess right now, not just us so we're not exactly lonely) or the fact that I'm jacked up on meds. Let me give you a quicky on the meds. The ever so great, oh don't get me started on my neurologist love-her-not-her-nurse, has me on full dose anti seizure Keppra and full dose anti seizure anti migraine Tramadol so I'm double meds right now. Yay! Side affects include : Somnolence - that's sleepiness, Depression, Nervousness, Anxiety, Hostility, Vertigo, Emotional Lability (emotional instability), and weight gain. Like as in 20 lbs. Those are just the ones I have actually experienced from the Keppra. I haven't been on the Tramadol long enough to figure out what kind of reactions I'm going to have to it or it's combination with the Keppra, will bring. Ooo except the wonderful foot and hand tinglies. It makes you get that feeling like when your hands and feet fall asleep? Oh yeah randomly and all the time. Only it doesn't go away and it doesn't have to do with circulation so walking around doesn't make it go away. Nice huh? It's a wonder I am able to get up in the morning, right? I'm just wondering at some point if I'm going to wake up asking myself if there's a reason to live because I woke up this morning wondering why I own dogs. I wanted to kill them this morning just because, no particular reason other than to just not have them anymore. Nice! I used to love my dogs, I volunteer for a rescue and get nothing for it other than personal gratification. No one ever thanks me for working in it and I've never asked to be thanked nor do I expect to be thanked. The fact that these dogs live better lives somewhere make me happy to do it. This morning I just wanted my dogs to drop off the face of the earth and die. It was one of my less than stellar mornings. Obviously. I know, it's at this point you're wondering if there's something not right here. Yeah, me too. Last night I had a notion that things were going downhill emotionally for me. I contacted the woman in charge of the applications review committee (the one I work once a week for and I LOVE this woman) and told her that I may need to take a break from reviewing for her for a little while. Poor thing, the review crew that she has working for her are a bunch of pathetic flakes and really there are only a few (like 2) of us that do our jobs consistently. So yeah, I kinda feel bad for trying to bail on her so we are trying to work something else out. 1 week on 1 week off, getting other new people, something. Who knows. Regardless, something's gotta work out, or give. Certainly not my already stretched sanity. I have called in and left a message at my doctors office. Not that I have any faith at all in the nurse getting back to me or relaying any sort of message of value to the doctor because she hasn't so far, why would she start now? Even when I went in there, in person, to talk to someone, that was never even noted in the chart. Absolutely the worst nurse I have ever experienced in my entire life. If I did my notebook taking like she does her chart taking I would have been out of a job so fast, and I didn't even have patients, I only did research for pharmaceuticals, way upstream! If/when I do get to talk to someone, and I don't care who it is, I will give them an ultimatum. I need to be off of at least one of these drugs. Preferable the Keppra, which is what they wanted to take me off of originally, but I want it done sooner rather than them taking another 50 friggin years and their own sweet damned time. I do not need to be on so many damned drugs for so damned long when I have never had any seizures and have jumped every hoop and done every test and even then 5 more on top of that. Even the MRI was unnecessary. Cool looking but only done because the nurse had not relayed the correct message to the neurologist. Stupid frak off nurse.....

Sunday, August 3, 2008

I did it, I hooped

And if you think there are any pictures to prove it you'd be wrong. But the good news is that it did happen. There are 2 things that I did learn though. Because hey, life is nothing if not one big fat learning experience (because God has a sense of humor and we are the butt end of all of his jokes) 1. I have little to no coordination but I kinda already knew this one and 2. my living room is a wee bit too small for these hooping/cirque de soleil escapades. Ooo there's a big surprise, 'cause really, whose isn't? I made the dogs stay outside for the whole DVD, they were pissed. I had lotsa pity. Oh wait, no I didn't. The kid was at my mom's so I didn't have to worry about stuffing her and her hoop in a corner somewhere. So yeah I figure I do the DVD every day for hmm say the next 2 years and I too can look close to that chickie in my last post? Well as long as I stop eating and forget the fact that I gave birth and all a few years ago and have had a multitude of random surgeries none of them being plastic too right? Yeah, we can all agree on that right? mm'k, glad we could get all that straight.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Unsuccessful excercise and oooo I want pair of these.....

I always mean to do it, really I do. I even used to belong to a gym out here. That I went to on occasion. Just ask the dh, he went on occasion too. Probably on more occasion than me but I did. I would probably go more often if I didn't have things like life and kid that got in the way but hey, that's just he way of it now isn't it? I did find that I was more likely to go to classes or the cardio cinema (dark room with machines and they played movies, loved that). Previously in my life there were a variety of things that I've found success with, in college when I lived in Maryland I liked spin classes and went nearly every day. I was in excellent shape. When I moved back to San Diego I found that the spin classes there sucked horribly, probably because most people just went outside to bike (fancy that!) and I can't bike irl to save my life, really, it's scary. When my dd was about 4 years old I found adult beginners ballet, which I was horrible at but enjoyed immensely. More than I ever thought possible, and I went about 3 times a week. I would love to continue with it but unfortunately in TX there are no good schools for it or at even practical times or places. Plus, wow, are dance classes expensive out here! Even for the kid. Like 3 times more expensive, and way less professional. I am very disappointed in what we have found. So then there's a variety of out doorsy stuff that I won't even bother going through. This is TX, don't waste my time 'k? 'K. I was sitting in a doctor's office and flipping through a magazine when I came across an little write up on a thing called Hoopnotica and it looked so fun I had to look up the website and make an order. And so I did. And I have a hoop and a DVD and so it has sat, looking cute and fun for what, 8 weeks now? The kid even has a hoop to match and she's hooped it up waaay more than I have. I should at least pop the DVD in the player and check out what it has on it even if I don't get up and do anything. Looser me it has yet to happen. I have received periodical emails from the company that taunt me to this day. The most recent one especially. This one features an absolutely lovely new product line, Melodia, they are now selling, God I hate them. It's made by a small company in San Diego, my home town, that caters mostly to belly dancers, something I have tried ever so very briefly in the past and had no talent whatsoever at. Now mind you, and this is really funny to me, I have a few friends that belly dance. They both make fun of me because both are a few sizes bigger than me, one told me that I'd be laughed out of her class for being a few sizes smaller than everyone in her class (I'm using the word 'few' loosely here). Oi, no love! And let me tell ya I was no good at all with belly dancing but I just loved the way it looked. I mean check out the outfit people! If the body comes with the clothing I'll give up whatever food, bad habit, what have you, buy the dvd, what ever, to get there, no really, I will, I'm totally sold.
So the moral of the story is...I should really look at the DVD shouldn't I? And 1 week post receiving the email have I? Nope, not yet. I have considered giving my neurologist a call and telling her to take all of these damn pills with the list of side affects (including weight gain, depression, anxiety, sleepiness, and depression, don't get me friggin started) and take them and shove them up her ass but since she doesn't answer my phone calls all it will probably do is up my anxiety level anyway so I don't bother. It's a wonder where I get the motivation to get up in the mornings some days....

Pool post!

The kid was finally taken to the pool this summer! I mean she's gone with friends and her grandmother but we haven't taken her yet and it's almost back to school time (thankfully). So the dh had the day off and he took her with the neighbor and her 2 boys. They had a great time and all are much better swimmers than last summer. The dh was a swim instructor for all of them last summer so I do brag of course. He liked being a swim instructor, too bad they didn't have a full time job doing that, he was really really good. The kids and parents always requested him, especially the special needs add/adhd ones. The other instructors were mostly high school kids and couldn't handle them well. My honey was very good with them and could work past their issues and fears. Then he'd go talk to the parents after every session and make sure they knew where their kids were doing well and where they needed more work. None of the other instructors did that. He was well loved. When he had to take a session off when I was in the hospital many of them took it off also because if he wasn't teaching they weren't going. Again, it was sad that they couldn't keep him on there, he was good at it and missed. Regardless, our kid got some swim time in finally, her favorite swim stroke is the butterfly. It was her father's too in high school on the swim team. Mainly because he was the only one that could do it. I suspect it may the same for her when the time comes. She did not get that talent from me, my limbs are not long enough to even consider that stroke. Hers though, they are all her daddy, just check out that last pic, my gawd she did not get those from my stumpy side of the family...