Friday, November 16, 2007

Evil little dogs...

..and slakin' husbands. So today we went to go pick up the kid from school and then ran some errands. So we put the dogs in their respective crates while we were gone.

Now mind you, all dogs in our house are crated when we are gone for various reasons. Roxy has this pissy little female bitchy thing. Literally. She waits until you leave and then finds a piece of carpet to pee on. We have only hardwood and tile downstairs and then baby gate the top of the stairs so it's easily avoidable but she also used to be a stray so if you're gone she'll also try and dig her way into a cabinet just in case it has food in it. She won't pee on the floors downstairs at all, once we baby gated the upstairs we didn't have any problems. Let her lose in the whole house and you're playing Russian Roulette with the carpets. So when we're gone she's crated.

Jaynie has a bad case of separation anxiety, he can kill many pillows if left to his own devices. He'll also sit in the window and freak out anytime anyone or anything goes by outside. He thinks trash cans are the devil's spawn, don't even get me started on what he thinks the people pushing them are. If a dog goes by his innards flip and become his outards and all hell breaks lose. So when we're gone he's crated.

The little man, Corbie, well he turns 1 yr old this month and since we sprang him from the kennel he had lived in for the first 9 months of his life he's been living the life of the destructive puppy that he never had a chance to do in his younger years. I mean months. He's not as bad as a labrador puppy but he does get into things and destroys them eventually. Not quickly, there's time if you notice him walking by with a sock, a kid toy, a writing utensil, a pair of boxers, a shoe, a shoe insert, paper, or other non-doggie chew toy object, to remove it from his mouth and it only get slobbied on. If he was a labrador the object would be instantly destroyed as soon as it hit the pup's mouth. Then there was that window moulding fetish. All of our windows are 5 ft windows with sills 1 ft above the floor. Perfect Frenchie chewing height. He also took a bit of training with the potty issue when we first got him in August. He had not been a house dog, he was to be a breeding/show dog so he was kept in a kennel which is not really potty training friendly. So when we're gone he's crated.

Add to all that if any thing toxic or bad is ingested by any of the dogs when they aren't being supervised I am not thrilled about having to spend oodles of money in vet bills due to Darwinism (lets face it, I own 3 of the stupidest dogs in the whole world, love them to death but not for their brains) I'd be pissed. At myself not them, they rely on their owners to be responsible, god did not give them more than 5 brain cells to share between the lot.

Anyway back to the point, it has happened on occasion that we have put all of their dogs in their respective crates only to forget to latch the door after putting them in. OK, I'm using the 'we' here when I really mean 'he'. For what ever reason the dh forgets sometimes. So far it's only happened with the big dogs, where we'd only have to deal with inanimate objects being destroyed. The big dogs won't eat things that'll hurt them, they are like 5 or 6 years old and way past the stupid puppy stage in their lives. Really what they do is annoying and not suicidal. Corbie will eat things that'll kill him and not think twice about it, puppies just do that. So today the dh forgot to latch the little guys cage. We come home after being gone for no less than 2 hours, plenty of time for Corbie to kill himself and when we open the door he's there to greet us. I'm like "Oh my god, quick someone check to see if the gate at the top of the stairs is closed." Thankfully it was and we checked around to see what kind of nightmare destruction/surgery-to-remove-foreign-object or at least major potty disaster we had to face and low and behold there was nothing. He got into nothing. And didn't have a single accident. It was nothing shy of a miracle. Now that doesn't mean we're going to ever try that again, the little turd gets into trouble while we're sitting there watching him so we are just chalking this one up to luck. We were lucky this time, I doubt we'll be able to get away with this again, but dang am I proud of my little man! He's such a little disaster waiting to happen and he was so good today I can't believe it. Now I'm sure tomorrow he'll go and take a crap on the carpet or something totally atrocious but that's the price you pay for a good 2 hours alone and angelic!


Jason said...

That's why I have cats. :-D

CL-Meister said...

The pleasure of having canines is the fury of finding they haven't a clue about what is right or wrong. No mater how many times you "show" or "tell" them.

Animals...aren't we all?