I was chatting (on G-chat) with a gf yesterday and was telling her about Attack of the Redneck Mommy, a blogger that she had not read yet. She said that her style reminded her of me. I didn't quite know if I should be offended or flattered. I didn't think I was quite that crude, or redneck? I mean my dad is navy, he did raise me on his own, he did make up his own swear words when he ran out of the standard ones (yes it does happen when you over abuse them, Navy guys can understand this). Yet I never considered myself redneck. I was raised in a very urban culture, 7th largest city in the US, very urban, very 'hip', no country. At all. Certainly no redneck, no no, must drive very very far away for redneck.
So last night I mentioned to the dh that my gf has said this and he commented that maybe it was true and that he has not been bothered by anything that I said on my blog and that I don't censor. Alright then, that being said all bets are off boys and girls and any form of censorship that I thought I had been using is now officially gone. Careful for what you wish for honey. and here you thought I hadn't been holding back, huh yeah sure right.
So you all have known that these lovely meds that I have been fighting to be off have now been wreaking havock with my not so stable mental stability for a few ok not so few months now are peaking. Oh yeah this morning was soooo much fun. The kid was at home last night so my mom came this morning to pick her up and take care of her, damn I hate my mom. Turns out the dd had had a melt down yesterday and my mom can't handle kids melting down. She couldn't when I was a kid, she can't now. She solves this problem the same way now as she did then, she tells the kid that they are a horrible person and that they are terrible and that no one likes them and that no one ever will. This goes on for quite some time and she screams and yells and she goes into a lovely demon mode and can't be talked down from it and eventually she just has to be left alone. It has a long term affect on the child usually and I went through most of my childhood believing her, I mean who wouldn't, right? She should have never been allowed to have a child, her leaving me when I was 8 was the best thing she ever did for me in her entire life. Why the hell my dad ever let her back in is beyond me, he's such a pushover. Anyway, FWIW I have arranged for another gf of mine to take care of my dd next week (thanks Kim!). So I have this lovely morning trying to get out of my house with my mom there and it doesn't go so well but I do get out, a bit late but I do get out. I get down the road a ways and realize that damn I forgot to take my meds. GAH. So I turn around and go back. To find my kid alone on the couch. Ask her where my mom is. The answer? I dunno. Great. I see her eventually. Out back standing with one of the dogs. OK fine. Too bad the kid doesn't even know where the freakish grandmother is. I tell the kid where that woman is so she knows, make sure she has everything she needs, take my meds and leave for work, even later than I already was. Gotta love that time clock. I hope she keeps it together today, I don't know if my mother can, she's just not that stable. Freak of nature that she is. If you're wondering what the kid's problem is, the dh has been working overtime and she misses her daddy. She's also seeing the side affects of my meds and watching me trying to hold it together which I'm not good at. Oh and since the dh isn't around to help, well that's fun too. He thinks by working over time it makes it better. Funny how that's a vicious cycle. The money may help, next month, maybe? In the meantime, no?
So this little Tramadol medication/dh anecdote I thought ya'll might find amusing, I have lost 4 pounds in the last 4 weeks but I'm sure that's just stress. DH told me 2 nights ago he liked the weight I was at when I left the hospital. So I guess I should have brain surgery more often. That is just so what you should tell your wife when she's medically induced emotionally morbid and 20lbs heavier than when she came out of the hospital right? He's got great timing. Maybe I should stop having sex with him until I lose the extra weight. Do you think that will get him to appreciate what he has rather than wanting something skinnier? No? Shall I try and find out? Yes? I think so too. I am not happy either, we should both suffer. Boys and their stupid penises should learn to appreciate what they don't have to have if we don't think they need to have it. Like I'm so fat at this weight. And I have to suck it up and be nice and have his mother out next week as it is. While on these awesome depressing meds. While he thinks I'm too fat. Don't even get me started. Why do women get maried? Remind me again? I mean it's not for the money, I earn almost twice as much and I carry the bennies. I do the bills. I take care of the kid and the dogs. Why do I keep him around? To remind me that I'm over weight? Shit my mom does a fine job of that and even if she doesn't I'm sure I could just look in a mirror. I was, after all, raised in So Cal. Go ahead remind me again....